The past few days have been emotionally draining for me.
When I am put in these positions I end up being pissed off at things for no reason.
Fortunately one of the things that I feel is very important is that I have a lot of good friends around me.
Here are some of the Quotes I really liked from the last few days, and explanations as to why I like them-
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“When you are truly honest with yourself then things like virtue, identity and the cocktail waitresses don’t mean shit.”
This Quote came from my buddy Kevin. He is a writer, and makes movies…one of them is called Hitch. Our relationship is way outside of the PUA Community, and for the most part I keep my mouth shut about people claiming that Hitch was based on them. However, Kevin is somewhat of a “Spiritual Adviser” for me. I call him for advice, a lot.
On Sun I had a particularly challenging day. Lots of crazy personal stuff. I called Kevin and my buddy Sean and literally talked to them for over 5 hours. Kevin said a whole bunch of crazy shit…really insightful and all that fun stuff.
However, what really stuck out was this…
“When you are truly honest with yourself then things like virtue, identity and the cocktail waitresses don’t mean shit.”
What this means is that when you can be true to who you are, when you can be honest with yourself then you can see who the real you is and not some Identity that we are trying to be. This happens most at times of desperation, when we are stripped down and humbled. The goal is to have that sense of honesty come out when we are not desperate.
How this relates to getting women – if you are too much ‘not yourself’ when meeting women, what are you going to end up with. Not only do you start off on the wrong foot, but you grow yourself via a facade rather than who you are. Get someone to like someone for who you are, and then all you have to be is yourself…that can be hard.
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“Change is not a matter of discipline, if you want to change all you need is a map that you can trust.”
This one comes from my buddy Chris who is one of the top Golf Instructors in the World. We were talking about Diet and nutrition stuff. Chris lost a ton of weight by doing this diet. Chris was not fat, but he always is trying new things to improve himself. If you ever hangout with him you will realize how ‘exuberant’ or a guy he is. He has a lot of drive. He was telling me how Golf, Dieting or anything in life is easy if you have the right map.
He told me that once he had made a choice to change all he needed was the right outline so that he could get the results he wanted. Once that happened it wasn’t a matter of will or discipline, it was a matter of taking simple actions. A good teacher has a good road map for his students. In many ways Chris and I are similar, but I learn a lot from him in how he teaches.
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“If your car is not working you gotta take the parts and then put em back in”
This sounds like some ‘Redneck Zen’ as they call it…but it actually comes from my friend Nate. He is a pretty interesting guy and there is nothing ‘Redneck’ or ‘Zen’ about him. He is a guy that is probably one of the smartest and most intellectual people I know. We were talking about Personal Change, and doing a Personal Inventory. Nate was saying that if stuff is not going on right in your life rather than looking at everything around you look inside. Take all those things out, look at them and clean them off…all that baggage, all that resentment, guilt, shame, fear…and so on. You see, your inner self is not corrupt. At least i don’t believe that.
But we all get corrupted. So you gotta clean that stuff of. You have got to be the person you were meant to be rather than a manifestation of these other things, like guilt, shame and fear.
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“Why do you gotta put on your helmet and motorcycle jacket to go to the grocery store?”
Now this is by my buddy Sean who has a lot of quotes that I like. He definitely has that ‘Redneck Zen’ vibe but but his neck is brown…hahahahaha! Sean is extremely wise, and has a lot to look up to as well.
He always says stuff like – “If you keep doing what you’re doing, you’re gonna keep getting what you’re getting”, however if Sean really wants to step it up he needs to start making Farm analogies..throw a pig or a barn in there and we are golden.
How this all came up was really awesome. We were talking about Pick Up and how people do stupid things because they think they work. The specific instance we were talking about is how the other night I was talking to my Waitress Friend and we are quite close and just to ‘Social Proof’ himself a PUA came up and said goodbye to us. There is nothing wrong with communicating with people, but this guys was doing it just to look cool…and nobody really cared. The PUA industry misses this point time and time again.
We dress up, learn lines and so on to impress people and then we forget to cultivate a life we want. We look up to frauds for help. It is pretty sad.
We end up dressing up to fit some image so people like us, when all we need to do is be ourselves more than anything.
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“If your life has purpose your identity is defined. But if you don’t have any purpose your identity defines you”
This actually comes from me talking to my buddy Nate again. It kind of fits the them of everything else i have been talking about. If you have purpose in your life then you don’t need your identity to define you. It is like what Kevin was saying…you gotta be true to yourself and others.
People try and create an Identity and they completely forget about who they are and what they want. You need to be someone who can be less driven by Identity and more driven by Purpose. Now sometimes you gotta ‘fake it till you make it’ but if you lose sight of your purpose your identity is not you…it is what other people think of you.
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Mon night I was supposed to mail out this PDF on the Mastermind Program. It is going out right now!!!!
Sorry, but most of these Quotes were said on Sun and Mon of this last week. In fact 4 of them were said within the short story below explaining why I didn’t mail out the PDF –
On Monday
I would have done so, but I ended up trying to meet up with 2 guys that were interested in the Mastermind Program.
One lives in DFW (where I live) and the other was visiting from Chicago.
Already at this point I was wearing pretty thin. There were many things that had been weighing down on me from the weekend.
I was writing at a Cafe and my buddy showed up who lives in DFW and was interested in the Mastermind Program. The plan was to meet the guy from Chicago at a strip club later.
Within all of this one of my bartender buddies asked me to come by to drop him off some food. As we were driving my buddy got a Flat tire.
We pulled over and couldn’t make it off the freeways but we made it over on the side of the road.
It was kind of a bad situation cause we didn’t have a spare that fit…long story.
Anyway, we spent a long time talking about stuff.
It may sound weird but, I get more out of those times than ‘Sarging’.
Probably cause I hear Quotes like the ones above!
Hahahaha! I know you man, from way back in the day…how come you never taught me this shit.