Tonight is the Lunar Eclipse!

Winter Solstice…craziness!

I am trying to kill some time as I wait for it to happen

The moon will be RED like!

In any case,

This week has been interesting.

Basically I have spent the past week working at this Poker House.

It is 3 dudes who play Online Poker and are fairly good at it.

There is my buddy from Austin, Sal, aka Haseeb, aka DogisHead

Ashton, aka Ashman


Dan, aka Jungleman12.

I don’t know shit about poker, but I do know that these guys are sorta famous in the online world.

Jungleman12 is pretty much dominating the Online Poker world beating pretty much everyone and at the moment leading in the Durrrr Challenge, a 50,000 hand poker match with Tom ‘Durrrr’ Dwan (Durrr himself).

Read about it here LINK

Jungleman is a poker badass.

*Me Harassing Jungleman12 during the 10,000th or so hand of the Durrr Challenge.  Jungle man is up half a million big ones at this point.  Dec 15th 2010*

How I came about all of this is from Sal.  He is from Austin and is a good friend.  A few months ago he was invited to live at this Poker Mastermind house, Jungleman had personally invited him.

That all being said it has been one of the most gratifying weeks of teaching I have had in a while.

1) Poker Players are a different mentality.

They think different.  I have worked with more than a few in my time teaching.  This forces me to be creative and be of service.

2) I am in Orlando, people love me here (go figure).

Orlando is one of those cities that has treated me very well.  First by the PUA scene –  Zuzu and the, Nektar who is an old school client of mine, and Anthony Johnson, Libido and tons of other guys I know…

and second I know tons of people here too.   Really good people that I have met traveling through Orlando for and or from teaching.

This week I met many more new friends too.  Don’t know what it is about Orlando but it is good to me.   I can’t tell you how many times I had someone come up to Dan and say “Steve is a really good guy stick with him”.   The best part is that many of the people had nothing to do with the PUA scene… friends…what a concept.

3) Creative breakthroughs in teaching.

We came up with some new stuff.  New exercises in delivery, and connecting.

The Poker Player mentality is very different and in order to achieve progress one can’t rely on simply on teaching people techniques.  In fact I am really against that.  My job is to be of service.  Adapt, be creative, actually work with people.

4) Meeting good people is invaluable.

The new friends I made in Orlando this time around were just really great people.  If you are doing what you really love, meeting people is not hard.   I am diggin’ it!

What has struck me most about the changes in myself and teaching is that I am starting to really love every aspect of it.

I have always really liked it but now it seems to be growing even more.

With Dan, things were much different than I have done in the past teaching wise.   I think tonight at dinner he summed it up best describing that the whole PUA or Seduction Industry is shaming.  Nobody wants to be part of it.

It teaches you to hide more than it teaches you to be proud.

I think way back when there were reasons for that.

People were talking about secret advice on women.  It was pretty crazy advice too.  It had to do with sex…god forbid!

The early scene was held together by some sort of camaraderie.

Then it became mainstream.

This fucked everything up.

Everything that was already fucked up became more fucked up.

And everything that wasn’t fucked up became exploited.

I knew I had to change things for my own sanity a few years back.

To be frank, it is easy to get caught in a life of confusion and contradiction when you’re being dishonest about things that directly relate to sex.

I had to look at what I really wanted in all of this.

I had to know why I was in this business.

I had to go back to the roots of it all.

What the hell made me want to keep teaching?

What the hell made me keep wanting to talk to women?

The sex, the status, the money (never really that much, LOL) run out as motivators pretty quick.

People said I am good at teaching.

People said I am one of the best teachers.

People said I my approach was unique.

People said that I changed their life.

Many of my clients really went out of their way to help me in bad times

And of course

Many people talked shit too

The fact of the matter is that none of those things could be the main reason for staying in.  If I was going to work within this Industry I needed to be for something bigger.

None of the above things were reasons enough to stay involved in the Industry.

I had to have something that went beyond the marketing, money, feedback, hate and… adoration.

If I am supposed to teach, and be in an industry of women I needed to have nothing and still be fulfilled with it.

There is only one reason to take on the role of personally working with another human beings and that is to find it as your ‘purpose’.

To be honest I learned this most from things outside of the PUA Industry.  I did a lot of service work, and still do, where it has nothing to do with money or status.  It has to do with being human.

I mean when it comes to some dude who is in prison or a junkie coming off heroin, or some guy who has been richer than us all combined from trafficking cocaine all the PUA, NLP, Self-help, Quick fix bullshit ain’t gonna help them be happy.

If that shit worked then it would be use dot rehabilitate people, but it doesn’t.  I mean those things might help a little bit but put the best PUA Instructor in with one of the guys that I work with every week and they’d be less than useless (if there is such a thing).  In fact most of them would get their asses kicked and learn the real meaning of the world ‘bitch’.

For service work there is no easy answer other than you have gotta put yourself in it.  You have got to make it your purpose.  You have got to believe in the capacity for any human to change and you have got to be tough too.

In fact if you do it to be a good person you’re doing it for the wrong reasons.  I do it because it keeps me sane.  I know what desperation feels like.  I know what it is like to have relief from that and to be honest I know you have got to give it away to keep it.

So when I was talking with Dan earlier tonight at dinner and we were dialoging back and forth about how…

We don’t think anyone really wants to be a part of the whole pick up scene.  Nobody wants to be part of something that is purely based on faking it or being something you’re not.

Nothing is personalized, nothing is truly based on you.  It is all ‘be like me, cause you suck’.

In order to get results you can’t be you.  It is based on shame.

The difference is there is no shame in what I teach.

There is no shame in who I am.

There is no shame in me being sexual.

I am not ashamed of it.

What I teach my clients I am not ashamed of, and what they learn they should not be ashamed of either.

Nobody is lying, nobody is faking it.

Nobody is even doing things in some bazaar exaggerated way.

There is truly nothing wrong with being sexual, there is truly nothing wrong with asserting who you are, there is noting wrong with experiencing sexuality with a woman you’re attracted to.

Sure people can judge, reject you and even not like you…People will always talk shit.  But if you are being you then be proud of that.

What other people are selling you is an antidote to your fears.

Man, fuck that and fuck them.


Your fears are you.  Embrace them.

Stop looking for a ‘result’ and start looking for an ‘experience’.

If you start living your life and defining your social and sexual life by ‘results’ without ‘experiences’ then you will be left emptier than you started it all off with.

If you look for ‘experiences’ that deliver you ‘results’ only then can you be happy.

In this Industry you hear a lot about people ‘getting’ something, or an overnight success… you hear a lot of hot air.

I am really fortunate to have the Clients, and Friends around me to remind me that those good moments everyone brags about mean nothing if I have nothing in between them.  I rarely hear about the PUA Industry making people ‘Happy’, but I hear a ton about it making people angry.

You want to be good with women?

You want to have a good social life, you want to be Sexual?

Then there is really nothing stopping you.

To live a life where you can be sexually free means you have got to be true to your own self.

This is what I mean when I say, “Live the Sexual Life”

It is an experience, and when you’re focused on the ‘experience’ then your ‘results’ will actually mean something.