TheSexual Life = Evolution of Life(style)


A while ago my friend Samir said something profound –

“The problem is that people think being good with women is independent for being a good man.”


This statement doesn’t just apply to men, but to everybody.

  • Through Seduction we reach Authenticity,
  • Through Authenticity we have Liberation 


Sex is bigger than our wants and needs, our wants and needs are a part of it.

It is a force of nature

It shapes our society, our culture and it gives us life.


We find ourselves afraid of it,

That fear turns into all sorts of deformations…so we try and control it.

If we can control something we can use it to make us happy…right?

We all agree in the power and need for sex, but we confuse ourselves trying to enjoy it.

Nearly all of our problems with sex come from this misinterpretation.


The idea of being ourselves sexually is something that is so far away from us.

If we are offered the opportunity to be our true sexual selves we think we need to be something we are not.


The conflict lies in this –

When you are being sexual you’re absolutely being who you are.

True sex and seduction forces you into authenticity.  The more you hold on to a façade while being sexual the more you will feel the pains of holding on to that façade.


It is impossible to live your best sexual life and your best social life without changing as a human being.


If you fight that change it will beat you,

If you’re not humble, you will be humiliated.

However if you submit to it you will grow into the person you were meant to be.

There will be no more search, no more confusion to who you are and what you’re supposed to be.


This morning I woke up early in Barcelona

My first night of good sleep in a while.

I knew the jetlag and heavy travel of the last 4 or 5 days needed a solid night of sleep.


I crashed in a Hostel in Barcelona, and it made me remember why I don’t like Hostels.    It’s a great idea, but to be honest I prefer to be alone.   I need my space.


Just like in all things if I get one bad idea in my head it can infect the rest.

I think we often forget the power perspective plays in our lives.

This is another lesson I learned from seduction.

You can be in the ideal situation, beautiful woman, great night out but if you’re not able to be completely open with her in the moment of seduction the experience becomes something other than sex.

In every moment there is a touch of the divine.  The simple phenomenon of life is beauty in itself, even when it is tearing us apart.   Experiencing life in its raw sense always has the most divine language written in it.


At 6am I decided to walk around and get lost somewhere.  I was consumed by my wants, and needs to have the ideal trip and desires to be open.

I was stuck in my head thinking about how I missed an entire day waiting in the airport sleeping on the floor, getting ripped off by the cab driver and how I only had a few days left.

I then spun off more into more thoughts about where I was going to go next…Morocco, Paris, Budapest…


Once I cave to the idea that I can find happiness in something outside of myself it turns into an obsession of trying to achieve it.   As soon as I try and find the answer, I am confronted by a limitless amount of potential answers.One of the key philosophies I have in life is to cut out negativity.  At some point I will write about this more thoroughly, for now it is fairly self-explanatory.I got out of the Hostel and started walking.I knew so long as I held on to my angst I would be stuck in its world.Things like anger, confusion, resentment and fear thrive off of isolation and alienation.  There are 2 things that always can open myself up to the world.1)   Stillness2)   Opening myself to the world
I walked down the boardwalk (surely a famous street that I am unfamiliar with).  I watched the sun cut its way through the buildings.The city was waking up to the world around it.I had no real direction, I just knew I needed to find that peace again.  I needed to search for my stillness.  I needed to find my meditation.I made it to a market.Half of the shops were still closed, selling meat, produce and seafood.I bought a kilo of cherries, realizing how bad my Spanish had gotten.

I continued my walking ending up at the harbor.

I sat there for a long while…

I let the world be the world around me.  I listened to the ocean, the wind and felt the sun’s harsh light on my face.



I stopped worrying about what my life was supposed to be.  I was able to see the separation between my

ego, wants and desires and the self existed below that.
It was then that I could smile and be happy.

I walked back to the center of the city.

I was awake, I was happy.  I was in unity with the world around me.

There were some people I talked to who were happy to see me and other that wanted to be left alone.


However in every action that I had after that moment I was no longer fighting what was around me.  I was no longer bound by what I didn’t have.

For myself Seduction has been the greatest teacher in my life.


We all want techniques, we all want results.

We might want wild sexual experiences, relationships and so on.  The world of fantasy never ends.
We want all of that because we don’t have happiness and fulfillment, and yet we never consider this as a part of the equation.


In my life as a Pick Up Artist I proved that I could have the skillset to approach, entertain and seduce the world around me.   However I missed the point of all this and was fortunate enough to be confronted, dominated and humbled by seduction.


Achieving that skillset to ‘get’ what I wanted and being one of the best PUAs in the world gave me nothing – in fact it left me off worse than I began.  That skillset means nothing if you’re not generating love in your life.   If you’re not seeing the world’s greatness in your interactions then your actions are simply limited to n act, a cool story and a boost to your ego that slips away once everyone stops paying attention.

If your actions have true purpose behind them then the moment of authenticity appears.

The true self is allowed to be seen.   What is so important about this moment is that the wisdom of life comes from the ability to distinguish your true self from the ego’s reactions to the world.


It isn’t until I can be myself that I can express myself to the world.

If I can express myself then my experiences all have a part of me in  them.

To live a truly Sexual Life, you need to be open to the world around you.

You need to be willing to feel what’s in front of you and allow those things to feel you.


If you’re only defining sex as the results of your wants then you’re happiness is only defined by a temporary alleviation from your discontent.


In about a week I am starting The Sexual Life Online.

The key to what this program is that it will let you live life.

It will put you into the action of being you.

Your skill set

Your technique will be a pure expression of who you are.

Your life will be what’s in front of you.

Women, Passion, Ideals will not be separate from each other.

They will be one fluid expression.


Today I am spending the day to myself.

Writing, thinking and seeing what comes to me.   I don’t have the fear of being alone…if it comes I allow it to pass.   I can distinguish the reactions of my ego and who I am.

I do know that as long as I live this way, only good things can happen.

I have the faith that if I have the right perspectives behind my actions that this is the recipe to the Sexual Life.



Be Social 

Be Sexual

Live Life


Steve Mayeda