By Steve Mayeda (El Topo)
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“I am in Scottdale AZ in late Nov 2009. I am teaching a guy who had dropped out of Sinn’s 12 Months to Mastery Program. I also have an assistant with me who had taken a Day Game Course that he very much appreciated from Sinn. We are at a Club and it is about 10:30pm. We see Sinn. I tell my assistant we should leave. My Assistant says he wants to see Sinn in action. We stay. It is probably the worst time to open. Opening is so dependent upon logistics. We watch Sinn get blown out over and over again. Anyone would get blown out at this time, the club is in a frenzy. For the past 7 months or so Sinn has been publically slamming me. Yet he comes up to me nervously acting like nothing has happened, like it is old times… He tells me, ‘This place sucks tonight’ I am surprised he is talking to me so I say, ‘yeah’ Then after a long pause I ask, ‘why are you talking to me’ He walks away and continues nervously trying to open sets. Later that night Jon takes a jab at me on his twitter account. Also later that night my Assistant and I go to a Strip Club and set up a date with 2 Stripper in 15 mins.”
This is an article that I have thought long and hard about writing.
I am not sure if I would call Jon an Emperor, but this article is not just about him. It is about the phenomenon of how the PUA industry has gone so wrong. If the PUA Emperor were to come out of his shell then he would be seen as the ‘fool’ he is. Sinn as well as many other PUAs who people look up to live in sort of a delusion of reality. The PUA community is guilty of this. You would never want to be them. The more you look up to them the more they distort into their own ill shaped definitions. Look at how they live (of what you can see) and ask why you would look up to them? Look at their techniques…if they even work… But don’t put anybody on a pedestal. In writing something that can offend you need to really take a careful look as to how it can effect someone. In this case, this is about my old friend Sinn, I call him Jon and so do most of us in the Dallas scene. This article is not meant to hurt anybody, but it is more to shed some light on a few things. For instance Sinn (Jon) Just posted an article and podcast on his blog talking shit on a bunch of people. Personally I am sick of all the shit talking. There is too much of it.
It is like every Instructor out there is dead set on bragging about themselves and how good they are. This is one of the main reasons for the BS in the community. The massive ego that perpetuates it, swirls around a smoke screen of shit. Rather than it being about bettering your life, it is about ‘Dressing Up’ and talking like a bunch of hens in the Kitchen.
It is sad that I am one of the only instructors that says “Judge Me by Me, Judge Me by my Students”…everyone else seems to say “Judge Me by my Façade”, and they have nothing to show for results with their students.
Fucking Pussies… You wanna meet my students, no prob, contact me, come to Dallas or Austin or find them in your Lair… You want to meet me face to face and talk about whatever come down and talk to me. But this Bullshit about hiding online or as some amalgamation of an online entity needs to stop. It ain’t only Jon who is guilty of this. The end goal isn’t supposed to be some ‘cool guy’ that people in forums look up to, it is to be a fucking person who is happy…
I do agree with a lot of Jon’s points with some of the guys and girls he calls out, but Jon should be the last person talking shit.
I am writing this for the reader’s benefit and hopefully for Sinn too. When I was run through the ringer I came out better. It made me define myself – not by what other people thought of me, but by me and my life.
Throughout my PUA Career I have had my dirty laundry thrown out for everyone to see. It am grateful for it. I got nothing to hide because of it. I am sure Jon will write some reactionary bullshit to this, cause that is what he does, and I say Bring It, and anybody else can too…all I gotta say is good luck to that.
To put things in perspective Jon has spent the last 9 months or so shit talking me, and blithering on and on about how I ripped him off and so and so. It is almost like it his absurd marketing tool. Jon wants attention = his shit talking and getting attention through his opinions. I have always remained quiet on my opinions on Jon and what he says about me. I don’t believe in shit talking.
At some point Sinn has got to be called out.
I always wondered why he would be so stupid to gossip about me, cause he knows I don’t’ care, he knows my customers don’t care and man I know a lot about him. I mean we all do in Dallas.
This article is not saying Sinn is a bad guy, a bad teacher or creates bad products. It is just my opinions on how things happened in our interactions with each other.
In fact I will say this – If I were to choose 3 teachers who are the best at teaching the basics of technical game it would be DJ Fuji – AFC Adam – and Sinn. There aren’t many people on their level. Based on me know how good of a teacher Jon is I would fully endorse him. Based on the feedback I have gotten from numerous students of his I would not endorse certain things – however he is one of the best PUA Instructors of all time. As someone who knows Jon fairly well I see him do this over and over going in circles. Sadly I see it over and over with his friends. In Feb/March of 2008 Captain Jack, Sinn and myself were planning to start a Pick up Company together. It was Captain Jack who dropped out of this first. CJ also encouraged me not to work with Jon, because of the pattern Jon had about turning on the people he was once friends with. At the current time it was Future (who is still a friend of mine) and in the past you could see the pattern of Lovedrop and Matador whom he had once been friends with and then switched on. I will still say to this day that one of the best BCs I have ever seen taught was a combination of Future and Jon. They would talk about how they were best friends and how great it was teaching together. As soon as Future stepped back from the community, Sinn then turned on him. It was not long after this that Shaft our other mutual friend told me to stop doing anything with Jon. He encouraged me to keep things very separate from him. In fact he told me that it was obvious Jon uses people and he did not give a shit about me and would suspect that Jon was being harmful and deceptive with me. I was well aware of the signs and of Jon’s history with people however there were a few reasons I liked and continued to work with him. 1- We were a great team. Jon is by far one of the best teachers at the basics. He is fucking great. He is also extremely abrasive with his students, this can be beneficial. I am not. I am the opposite. Also I teach things far less structured than Jon, but at the same time far more customized and far more advanced. 2- I thought it would be good for my reputation and good for sales. To be honest we kicked ass. If CJ had formed with us it would have been phenomenal. I mean nothing could come close. Jon is a very necessary component in all of this because at teaching the basics he is far better than CJ or myself. CJ has his own highlights and I do as well, but they are taught best if someone already has a strong foundation. You see how Egos and Bullshit keep that from happening. I am sure I had a big part in us not combining and CJ too, but no one had a bigger part than Sinn. He completely fucked it up. I will withhold the info between him and CJ but let’s just say they still talk with each other but they will never work together. You can’t trust Jon. After a while the signs started to be really obvious. In fact I have never discussed this with Jon, and this is one of my huge faults in the relationship. Yes, more people read my blog when he linked and wrote about me. However when teamed with Jon I actually sold less. In addition to that I was in a lawsuit and Jon was suspected of leaking information. So I did what Leonardo DiCaprio suggests in The Departed (one of Jon’s favorite movies) I leaked out information to him that I told no one else and within 48 hours it came out on the other end. In addition to all that I had encouraged Sinn to write stacks like theREDstack. I gave him a few samples and a template of mine and he immediately started selling stacks. Within a few weeks of the completion of his first Stack people started comparing them to the ones they had gotten from me and he basically just used the samples that I gave him, customizing very little. He also charged more than me. It was then that I made huge adjustments to theREDstack so it would not get polluted by him continuing to write based off of theREDstack. And he wants to call me a theif… Other than that he started doing weird stuff, like never emailing of texting. He kept everything out of writing, this led me to believe he was warned to not do this by my legal opponents because it might come up in court.
All this came to a close around May of 2008.
We had a few Lair talks scheduled and he flaked on a few so that was it. I would distance myself. My one major wrong here was I never confronted him on these issues. The whole time he thought it was because he cut me out of the Lay Report book he was putting out so it could get marketed to Love System’s list, apparently Love System demanded that my LRs had to be taken out of it to market the book. This is also an asshole move, but that is how Jon is, you can expect that there is no sense of loyalty and always subtle backstabbing. The things I listed before were the real reasons I stopped talking to him. In July of 2008 I really started to make some major changes in my life. I started to completely cut people out of my life who were not good influences. Some were women and others were PUA people. One of those was Jon. Now at the time CJ was also laying low from hanging out with Jon and he had begun to burn bridges with pretty much all of the other core Dallas people.
I will keep from naming names here (even their PUA names) but the only person who would hang out with him, also was having trouble getting along with Jon, he could no longer bring his normal friends around Jon because Jon would always piss them off. He could only meet with Jon alone, and could not go out with him to meet women either.
As time has told, CJ never built a feud with Jon, but he did need a break from him, about a years worth of one. Jon was let alone in Dallas. Nobody would hangout with him. I gave my reasons above, but here are some of the other ones that I think many people who know Jon can agree with–
If a set was going good for you and not for him he would wreck it. I can’t tell you how many times this happened. It happened on my first BC I worked with him in Vegas 3 years ago and I still got the girl, and it happened on the last Vegas BC I worked with him where I got the girl I had met that night to fly out to Austin to see me in just a few days. The girl did not want to talk to him in Austin and we were teaching 1 student together…Jon blew up and started yelling at the girl and me and everyone else around. There are countless stories of these. If you have done a workshop with him you have seen it, I am sure.
He would ‘game’ so mechanically and reactive. It was like routine after routine, all of our Dallas crew was really opposite from that. We all used massive amounts of Structure, but are very normal and Natural in how we execute it. It was like gaming with a robot, which can have its benefits, but it was also like talking to a robot.
In Dallas there are some guys who are really good at Stripper Game, I wanted to learn it. We had to not go with Jon because to be honest he was horrible at it. I really don’t think he should be teaching it. He is worse than the guy who has the pasty skin and come-over in the strip club. He would try and play a value based game with them and Neg them, and as soon as it wouldn’t go his way (always) it would be as another Dallas PUA put it ‘Jon would release a grenade of negativity’ and the whole club would be fucked for the night. Within the first 3 months of me trying Stripper Game out I laid 8 Strippers. In the 2 years Jon was in Dallas, I know of NO (that’s right Zero) Strippers he Laid. I know of 1 Waitress who was definitely hot but later she ended up trying to sleep with all of us, CJ and myself. Out of respect for Jon (which is one this I will say Jon is good with – he will not sleep with your girl) none of us slept with her.
Now we have all been guilty of some flaws in the Dallas Scene, but Jon was way too all over the place. He would lose his shit and blow up at women we were dating or gaming, his friends and many of the specific reasons we never did form a business with him CJ and myself were because of his Volatility. Everything was a competition, everything had to be his way, everything had to be based on some bullshit structure of assumed alphaness. No one else in Dallas had this trait. It got old. I am sure I am a close second to Jon in erratic behavior, however, mine did not repel the people around me. I have friends, I have a ton. I have people that would and have make huge sacrifices for me. Jon has got a trail of ash and shit behind him.
-Steals Material and Brand it as his
You can see this with pretty much everything. Stripper Game he teaches Mystery’s stripper game, and it sucks. Day Game, he took from Mystery, although with this one he does have some innovations. Hired Guns he uses Mystery’s model Breakthrough Comfort is what Future did and Jon helped structure it, but Future developed it. SNLs are all CJ, in fact I would say Jon is very good at them, but the repeatable process that CJ developed Jon leave out a ton of info. theREDstack is me, and I am happy that theREDstack was too hard of a nut for Jon to crack. He could never understand why it worked…probably because it is too normal. What did Jon create all on his own… What he is extremely gifted at is taking concepts from other people and making them very teachable. This is very valuable. But he is no innovator.
– Quantity not Quality
Of all the girls I have seen Jon pull (maybe 60) only 3 I would say I thought were hot. Now don’t get me wrong, he is more than capable of getting really hot women, however it was always more about getting laid. You don’t meet quality women that way. I may not always want a relationship, but I need to go for the woman I want, and not just what is in front of me. Also he would rarely keep them around, and maybe he would be able to keep a girl for a few weeks. To my knowledge he never had a real relationship with a girl. Plus there never seemed to be any sexual satisfaction with him or the girl. It was all about the lay. Personally I feel that I would rather have the ability to please any girl than just fuck her for 2mins and never talk to her again.
-Constantly Lying about his Identity
When I took my Boot Camp with him, he was a Stand up Comedian. He was never a stand up Comedian, Future was. Then he was Club Promoter – I don’t think Jon has any friends that run club, I don’t think he is capable of it. Then he was traveling around the country as a Photographer. I am a Photographer – if he is where are the pics? You can search Steve Mayeda online and find some of my Photos that I shot throughout the years. I will even post my more current Photography (give me a few days) on my facebook page facebook.com/theMayeda for you to see them. I am sure he has also been an Actor, MMA Fighter, Producer, Writer and so on… Here is the reality of people who lie about their Identity –
They are Scared little boys wanting to be men.
At this point as one of the Dallas PUAs put it,
“the Great Sinn has no friends…”
He became alienated from all of us. It must have sucked for him. So because nobody really wanted to go out with him or even be his friend he broke his lease and moved off… Instead of adventuring of to see the world he was forced out of a social scene…and you pay him to learn social dynamics. And the day he was gone we all went out again, and just hung out like normal dudes again. DFW was fun again… We probably should have told him what we thought, or perhaps what I thought. I had thought for a long time Jon needed to go out and live life. He should drop out of the PUA scene actually get a girlfriend, fall in love, fail, have life beat you up a bit and grab a sense of reality.
When I was his age, I was the same way, but in terms of Art. I didn’t have a bunch of people online worshiping me. The reality and the illusion of Sinn was almost like polar opposites. What I saw was a guy who was lonely, had no friends, didn’t know how to be a friend, and wasn’t even sexually confident. It was like he had slept with all these women and didn’t even know how to please a woman or enjoy sex. To me that seemed absurd. But when I was his age and in his shoes I probably would have done the same thing.
The thing was and is, the PUA community keeps him out of the reality of his shortcomings. In fact his shortcomings are not all that bad. They are things pretty much all of us can relate with. However my further alienation from Jon built tension. I was advised not to talk to him at all by my attorneys and this I feel further pissed him off. We had loose ends, personally and in business that would have to wait until after my legal matter was resolved.
Jon started talking shit publically, and so in March of 2009 I went to discuss these things with him at Mehow’s Superconference. What is interesting here is that both of us were mic’d up. He was about to speak and I had an interview to do. The person doing the recording for my interview had been recoding me for hours on accident. I have always been tempted to put this conversation online to clear the air a bit, but that would not really serve the purpose in the matter. I basically tell Jon my part in matters and ask him how I can make them right. He blows up telling me that I spread rumors about him, steal from him and my students, am the most manipulative person in the world, and so on.
I politely listened and kept asking how can I make this right. I asked him to make clear some of the accusations he was making, but did not argue.
Everyone who has heard the Audio says he described himself in the whole thing when blowing up at me.
He continued to talk more and more shit. I would never give a public opinion on Jon. At the time he was mid way through his 12 Months to Mastery Program and at that time people started dropping out and hiring me. I am not sure how many people he had signed up for the program but 8 hired me and gave me unfavorable feedback towards the program. I expected this, mainly because I know Jon is one of the Best Instructors out there, but at the things he was claiming to help them with he was not a good teacher for that. Not that he was a bad guy, but more because things that had to do with real life, customizing, or lasting changes were not his strong points. There were 3 guys that continued the program to the end that also worked with me.
1 of Jon’s 12 Months to Mastery students told me that his game actually got worse from staying in the program.
If any of you know me, I record all my phone consults to email to the student afterwards. Everyone knows they are being recorded. I have a library now of poor reviews on audio for his 12 months to mastery course.
One of the other students from the program also told me that Jon posted an exaggerated story about him in his second edition of the Game Acceleration Doctrine. Rule #1 – Never post a false review
I tell you all of this and still say Jon Sinn is one of the Best PUA instructors of all time, but he is not good at everything.
I also tell you this cause in his ‘Charlatans ‘ post he wrote 3 Categories that he would rate these imposters on.
Here are the 3 Categories as taken from his blog –
“The 3 categories: Category 1: Crappy dating advice. It won’t help you with chicks and may even have you worse off than before you started. Category 2: Socially creepy person. A guy/girl who comes across as a creep in society but wants to give you social advice. Category 3: Can’t do it himself, a book reporter. Person who blatantly rips off other people’s works, writes a book report to repackage and still can’t start a conversation with a woman.”
Jon Sinn fits all these categories pretty well. However I would not call Jon a Charlatan. He is a legit teacher, but the guy needs to grow up.
In fact when I survey my customers, people always tell me how helpful his blog and content it. Everyone says it is one of the Best out there…and I would agree. He gives great advice but lives a Shitty Life. Perhaps the point of this is not to just clear the air, but also help Jon get some clarity (cause I know he will read this) but also to show that all the shit talking is pretty much the most pussy ass thing you can do. From what I know about Jon is he won’t say shit to my face, but online or on a call with Barry Kirkey he will open his mouth. That is what a coward does. The community needs to stop that. In fact I agree with a lot of the people he listed as ‘Charlatans’, but I believe the answer is to not play into this bullshit – shit talking pseudo alpha crap – but rather learn from it and produce quality.
Have that quality redefine the negative aspects of the things in your life.
I am sure this will stir some bullshit gossip, but to be honest, who gives a shit about that? Look at this story and realize that there is more to life than being a ‘Pick Up Guy’. Jon isn’t the only one who has turned his life into a rats nest of bullshit. In fact there are very few people out there who teach that I would ever look up to.